It would have been nice…
It would have been nice to have been prioritized in a position other than last.
It would have been nice to talk one on one, in person, without the distractions of crowds or time.
It would have been nice to have you make an effort to want to see me without me making the effort first.
It would have been nice to have been thanked for the effort I made in showing and explaining my passions to you.
It would have been nice to be seen as more than an emotional support.
It would have been nice to have been with someone who wanted something deeper, richer, more intense and powerful
It would have been nice not have been made to feel like shit, even if it was only once.
I let you in. I told you things that I never told anyone before.
I sang for you—because I love singing, and you wanted me to sing for you.
I discussed my hopes, my fears, and weaknesses.
I had tears in my eyes talking to you.
I let you in…and when it became inconvenient for you…you wanted to stay half in and half out, and keep the easy parts of my friendship, and get rid of the hard parts. But then again, maybe it was always inconvenient for you. You never said it…but actions speak louder than words.
So for now…I’ve kicked you out.
I need time to deal with the hurt, the pain, and prioritize MYSELF. No one is going to do that for me.
And even though I know you have your own heartache, grief, pain, and demons to deal with, even though I KNOW it would be difficult…
It would have been nice to be let in instead of staring from outside the window, coaxing you to come out.
It would have been nice to be let in.
Because it would have been fabulous.
It would have been nice to be let in.
Adrian's Blog ( A deep dive into my mind) 
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